


Trying to Fix Stupid (With Mixed Results)

by Kelly_Namikaze



Category: Final Fantasy VIII
Genre: Advice, Angst, At least for a bit, Baby Squall, Don't Examine This Too Closely, Ficlets, Fluff, Mostly the male Oc, Multi, Mystery, POV all over the place, Pregnancy, Time Travel
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-05
Updated: 2020-01-07
Packaged: 2020-04-11 10:39:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 9
Words: 6,752
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19107991
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kelly_Namikaze/pseuds/Kelly_Namikaze
Summary: "You always know what's going to happen, disappear randomly, and have supposedly met people that were dead before you were born. What are you?" Her arms were crossed, an icy gaze holding me in place.I sighed, and gestured to the couch cushion beside me. "Sit down dear, and I'll tell you a story."(Or: When life gives you lemons, chuck them at your enemies and give out life lessons to people years older than you.)





	1. Not for Lapdogs

**Author's Note:**

> Umm... so I have been writing lately, just not in the right fandoms. Anyways, this is something I have been working on for the past week or so, (there are lots of chapters ready to post) about an Oc I made to vent my frustrations at certain characters. Please enjoy, and let me know what you think in the comments!

Another day, another raid. I watched with dispassionate eyes as the soldiers decimated yet another small town. Wandering through the streets, I could hear the civilians cry out for help, and I relished in it, in the suffering of those lesser than me. As I walked, I noticed a group of soldiers following a boy, and I stopped.

If asked, I would not be able to tell you why I stepped in. Maybe it was the hair, a blonde so bright it rivaled my own, free of soot and dirt, which was odd. Or maybe it was the eyes, a steel blue, filled with defiance and strength just like-  **_NO._ **

Grabbing the shoulders of the boy as he rushed by me, I waved off the soldiers. When I examined him, I realized that he was fourteen, only a few years younger than myself.

“Your name?” I asked, and he glared at me, and for a moment it wasn’t this child. It was Squall (A shot of pain laced with anger shot through my mind as I thought his name, saw his face), and I went from indifferent to rage in a moment. “Well?” I growled, my grip tightening.

“My name is not for the likes of you, lapdog.” He spat at my feet. “ _ Sir. _ ”

My anger grew at this, and I placed one hand on my gunblade. “Watch what you say, you could lose something important.” I warned.

“Like what you already have?” I stilled for a second in confusion, and he pressed onwards. “Was it worth it? To lose everything you held dear? Your freedom, life,  _ love _ ?”

There was a tug on my mind, and I drew my blade. “You have no clue what you’re talking about.”  _ Yes, _ a voice whispered, one I knew well _. Kill the boy, he is dangerous. _

“Don’t I?” He asked in response, when his eyes suddenly sharpened, looking off into the distance. “Your mistress grows near. Goodbye Almasy. May Hyne have mercy on your soul.”

And he was gone.

I had almost convinced myself it was just my imagination, a hallucination from the many days on the battlefield, when I felt Ultimecia curl around my mind yet again, drawing me under.

_ Sleep… _


	2. You are my Sunshine, my only Sunshine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This kid is... a goddamn hurricane

I wandered through the small town, taking in the peace that settled throughout the area. The picturesque countryside felt warm and welcoming, (like coming home) and I felt a smile split my face as I went in search for the only tavern for miles.

The Sleeping Lion.

It was still early, so I didn’t expect an answer when I knocked, but to my surprise, the door swung open, an irate woman standing with her hands on her hips. “George, I told you I don’t open until- oh. You’re not George.” Stifling a laugh, I shook my head.

“No, Ma’am, I’m not. You wouldn’t happen to be Raine Leonhart though, would you?”

“Yes… I am. Can I ask what a young boy like you is doing looking for me, at a bar?” She asked, and I rubbed the back of my head sheepishly.

“About that, you need to get in contact with your husband, soon. A small town like this isn’t exactly equipped for the complications of childbirth.” I warned, hoping that she’d take it to heart.

She frowned at me. “Well young man, I don’t think that’s any of your business. I don’t recognize you, are you from around here?”

“No, I’m just passing through. Figured I’d impart some wisdom.”

She raised an eyebrow at me. “You’re a little young to be teaching.”

“Only if you think I’m really twelve. Goodbye, Raine. I’ll see you another day.” I turned around, and began walking away.

“Wait!” I looked over my shoulder to see her with an arm outstretched. “You have a name?”

“Hmmm? Oh, it’s L$%#.”

######################

A month later, Raine woke up to someone knocking on the door to the bar. She was showing now, just barely, and grumpily made her way downstairs, opening the door to glare down at-

At L%$#.

“What are you doing, thought you were just passing through?” She asked, and the blonde preteen shrugged.

“Thought you could use some help. After all, I’m sure it’s not easy having to run an entire bar on your own.”

She snorted. “You’re twelve, there’s no way I can let you help out at the bar.”

Blue eyes rolled backwards. “Well, duh. Look, you’re going to have less energy as the days go by, and I was more suggesting housekeeping every now and then.”

“Give me one good reason.” When his eyes settled on her stomach, she frowned. “Fine, but you do exactly what I tell you.”

He beamed at her, breezing inside, and the older woman sighed. It felt like she had just given him an open invitation to shake up her life. “So watcha got for me, miss?”

“Squirt, just call me Raine. And don’t climb the bar!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Having fun with this, so wait for part two where stuff gets sad. Have a wonderful day?


	3. Ballroom Blitz (Well, Almost)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Heels are torture devices meant to hobble women from reaching their full potential, Rinoa was certain of it.

I put the finishing touches on my makeup before I exited the bathroom in search of the ballroom. Balamb was kinda complicated, and I was already late by five minutes. Not that anybody would notice, especially Seifer, but that wasn’t the point.

Not looking where I was going, it was a surprise when I tripped over a crack in the floor. Shrieking, I prepared myself for the inevitable mess that was about to occur, when I was caught in a pair of strong arms.

“You okay?” A voice asked, and I looked up to see a teen about fourteen years old look at me with concern. Blushing, I quickly righted myself, smoothing out my short dress.

“Oh, thanks! And I’m totally fine, just haven’t quite broken in these shoes yet. Stupid heels!” I rambled, and stopped myself when I saw his outfit; the uniform for a garden cadet. “Are you going to the ball?”

He tilted his head in confusion, his gray eyes squinted slightly. “Huh?” I gestured to his outfit, and his expression cleared. “Oh, I’m just meeting with a friend, but they won’t let me in without formal wear.”

“Neat! I take it you’re a cadet here?” I asked, and he rubbed the back of his head sheepishly.

“No, I’m from Galbadia Garden. But I had a few reasons for coming here, not just seeing my friend.” His response made me slouch slightly.

“Aww, I was hoping you could help me find the ballroom!” He brightened at this, a smile lighting up his face.

“That’s okay!” He pointed in the opposite direction. “It’s that way. The gardens are relatively easy to navigate once you know what you’re doing. Want me to escort you?”

He offered his arm to me, which I gladly latched onto. “Please.”

As we began our walk, he laughed nervously. “You know, I just realized that I never asked for your name.”

I facepalmed at this, careful to not disturb my hard work. “I’m so sorry. Rinoa Heartilly. And you are?”

“I’m L-#&$ %$&^#@.”  All I heard was static when he tried to speak. He looked hopefully at me, but when he saw my look of confusion, his face fell. “Figures. My name isn’t really all that important. I have a feeling you’ll be well known by the world though, miss Heartilly.”

“Thanks L.” He gave me a weak smile, and stopped walking. It took me a second to realize that we had arrived. “Oh. I guess I’ll see you later then.” When I moved to walk into the ball, a light grip on my wrist stopped me.

“Rinoa.” Blonde bangs covered his eyes, and L looked… defeated. “He is important, be careful with him. He will be the most important person in your life, if you do not drive him away.” And suddenly, he was back to a happy teen, who had let go of my wrist. “Seeya!”

And he was gone.

I blinked multiple times, but he was no longer there. Turning around, I spotted a cutie standing by the entrance, with the same eyes as that boy. Well, I had some time to kill before meeting with the headmaster.

“You’re the best looking guy here.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one took a more ominous tone than I intended towards the end, but I'm still happy with how it turned out. Anyways, have a wonderful day, and don't forget to review!


	4. Run Away, (coward)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An explanation! Wee!

She was giving me an icy look, and I knew there was no avoiding it. “You always know when something is going to happen, disappear randomly, and you have met everyone in dads friend group  _ before _ the war. And you’re my age.” Julia-Raine was a force of nature, so much like her father as she crossed her arms that I had to blink for a moment.

“Sit down, dear, and I’ll tell you a story.” I gestured to the other end of the couch, and her eyes narrowed before she walked over, strides purposeful and controlled. Sitting down, she urged me on with a look.

“A few years from now, a couple had a baby boy. He was a full month early, and the doctors weren’t sure if he could ever survive without the support of many machines. But even so, he cried out in defiance, his underdeveloped lungs protesting his own weakness. Nurses complained to the couple about his wailing, but the father simply chuckled and told them it meant he was strong, the mother giving a very small smile.”

“And one night, the wailing stopped.”

Julia’s brow wrinkled in confusion. “What happened?” She looked invested in the story, or as much as Leonhart’s offspring could.

I shrugged. “He had died. And no one thought anything of it, thinking that the child had finally decided to sleep, for once. Only when his mid-night check up came around did anyone notice an issue, and there was a flurry of activity around him.”

“But the soul is a stubborn thing. He laid there for quite some time, enough for his mother to arrive, worried and already mourning. When she picked him up to hold for one last time, his eyes flew open, locking with hers. This was the first time it had happened, and she cried as she found an identical set of eyes to her own.”

“Something like this had never happened without the assistance of magic, and was labeled a miracle. Soon after, his body recovered, and was a healthy, happy baby. He went home with his parents, and spent the next five years as a normal child, playing without worry. Days went by and he was called the sun of his parents lives. He was named appropriately.” A wry grin found its way onto my face.

“Loke Solas Almasy.” Even though she had obviously known that I was talking about myself, the slight look of shock was entertaining.

“So Seifer and Tariah are your actual parents?”

I chuckled bitterly, nodding. “Yep. I was almost six, and life was peaceful. It was a Sunday, and I was playing with Dad when I just… disappeared.”

The brunette next to me looked concerned. “And they didn’t look?”

“It’s not that simple. My father assumed the worst, Ultimecia. The search was frantic, and he found it easier to bear without memories. Ifrit gladly stole them away, mother’s GF doing the same.”

“How could they do that, they were your parents?” She sounded offended.

Sighing, I rubbed my forehead. “Julia, I was  _ gone _ . There was no possible way to get me back, and they coped the best they could. Of course, that leaves the question, where was I?”

“This part is a little blurry, as I ended up stumbling around Galbadia before someone took pity on me, and took me to the Garden there, where I realized that not only had traveled to an entirely different continent, but the year wasn’t right, by around ten years, but I was five. It didn’t truly register with me.”

“And though I didn’t understand what happened, as training started, I began to realize what I could do. What I had done.” I tapped one of my temples and winked at her. “Self taught time slash space slash dimension traveler, sweet cheeks.”

She frowned. “So what? You just showed up when people needed it?”

“My mom and dad, the ones I was born to.” I clarified, “Were happy, and at peace for the most part, but there was always a darkness lurking in their eyes, especially dad. When I saw Seifer as a teen, unburdened and without the scars of war, I wanted to prevent that. So I tried to give advice, learning from the people I knew in the future. And the fourth?” I asked myself. “Time I met  _ this  _ Tariah, I was fifteen, I think, and she had offered me a place to stay the night.”

“And I just kept showing up, randomly. Sometimes full years within visits for her, until one day about four years ago, a pile of papers were dropped in front of me when I was visiting.”

The memory made me smile, even now. “Adoption papers, but she told me if I accepted that I had to stick around for more than two weeks at a time, and make sure I kept in contact regularly.”

“So now you spend your time here.” It was more of a statement than a question, but I nodded anyways.

“For the most part. There are still a few…  _ places _ I like to keep an eye on. I have learned, that outside of actually picking up people and moving them, some events can’t be changed. But some can be softened, the wounds not quite as deep as they could be.”

A sigh was heard from beside me, and I looked over to see tears in her eyes, which surprised me. “I’m sorry Loke. I shouldn’t have forced that out of you.”

I gave her a cheery grin. “Ahh, I should’ve told you awhile ago. Someone has to tell the others when I die why I was so awesome!” Rolling her eyes, she pulled me into a hug.

“Whatever, idiot.” Grinning at the familiar phrase, I held onto the comfort she gave, letting myself relax, and eventually drift off.

Safe and content, finally having someone who  _ knows. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this, even if it’s really just setting up some future stuff. If you have any questions, please do ask! Have a wonderful day!


	5. When it Raines, it Pours

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I wasn't even going to stick around, at first. But Raine looked so much like mom, and I suddenly needed to make sure she was okay." I let a tear fall, looking at the peaceful night sky. "But in the end, I didn't change anything at all. Why do I even try?"

I had hoped that with my help, she would have been okay, that it was the stress of having little support, and missing both her husband and adoptive daughter. There was little I could do for the second, but I thought that maybe I could prevent the first.

Yet, with the beginning of her eighth month of pregnancy came worrying symptoms. Drained of much more energy than she should be, barely being able to walk, and constant nausea that was odd for this late into a pregnancy.

With each passing day, the symptoms got worse, to the point I was skipping sleep to care for her, the only time I could get away from Garden without being noticed. I watched over her, doing the household chores as she slept, making sure everything was made for the next day.

Her bar was closed more and more often, and as she approached her due date, she was in bed more often than not, a fever being added to her health concerns. Ellone returning had brought back her smiles more often, and the girl was sweet and easy to deal with, thank Hyne.

It was a Saturday when her labour started. As soon as I walked into the place, being given a key a while back, I heard her screaming. Rushing up the stairs, I knocked on her door.

“Raine!?” I called, concern colouring my voice heavily.

Her cries of pain took a moment to die down, and I almost went to break down the door when she answered. “Get me Charlotte!” She yelled, and I felt my my breath stop in my chest, even as I followed her order.

Charlotte was a good friend of Raine’s who had agreed to help her through labour, as she already had three young ones. Even when I had urged her to go to a hospital for the birth, she had refused, and I cursed myself for not pushing more as I ran full tilt through town. Briefly, I thanked whatever god I could that Ellone was staying at a friends house.

Banging on the door in front of me, I guess I must’ve looked disheveled when the woman finally opened it, for she simply grabbed a bag that was by the door before following me, no words spoken.

And when we got back, I was immediately put to work, grabbing various things, towels and blankets, water, the like. Then I was told to wait outside, where I sat in the hallway for hours, until the cries of a newborn filled the small home. I stood up and began pacing anxiously.

This was the beginning of the end, those minutes before I was let in, my mind ran wild, knowing that for all that I had done, Squall would still most likely end up in the orphanage with the others.

“Aslan?” I turned my head at the voice, seeing Charlotte standing in the doorway to Raine’s room, a tired look on her face. “Your aunt would like to see you.”

I nodded, going to enter the room. “There is coffee and dinner on the counter downstairs, though it may have to be reheated.”

“You’re an angel. I’ll go get Ellone after I have some coffee.” With that, she disappeared downstairs, and I turned to see someone who had become a, guardian of sorts to me in the past months, look so sickly that it hurt.

Somehow, though, she managed to look beautiful, her smile the biggest I had ever seen. A small baby laid on her chest, light brown wisps of hair still slightly damp clung to his skull. “Loke?” She asked, and I forced a smile as I came to stand beside her.

“Yes, aunt Raine?” She looked at me in shock for a moment before lifting the child towards me.

“I’d like you to meet Squall, Squall Leonhart.”

I swallowed the lump in my throat, looking down at the future savior of the world, as just a baby. Picking him up, I had to blink away tears as I realized that all my efforts had meant nothing. “Not Loire?”

Her smile faded, making the circles under her eyes became more obvious, and I cursed myself. “I love Laguna, but… he had a choice to return, to meet his son as he came into the world, and he chose others. I could never blame him for that, but nor will I forget that. That he had things more important to him than family.”

I closed my eyes for a moment, thinking back to a vision of Squall as an adult, left to become cold and distant, so similar yet different from his mother. “Well, he’s going to take more after you anyways.” I stated, handing the baby back to her. “I’m going to go get you some food, and make sure Ellone is settled before I leave.” I couldn’t stay, not with my heart breaking every moment I was reminded of my failure.

She frowned for a second, probably so used to my presence that she didn’t like the thought of me on my own. “Of course, I’m sure your friend is worried.” I didn’t bother to tell her it was a Saturday, and therefore he wouldn’t care.

Leaving as quickly as I could without it looking like I was running away, I got into the kitchen just as Ellone came bouncing through the doors, lighting up when she saw me. “Aslan!” I caught her in a hug, spinning her in a circle.

“Have you eaten yet?” I asked, and she shook her head. “How about you go sit down, and I’ll fix you a plate.” She nodded eagerly, and Charlotte, who I had just realized was accompanying the girl, went to sit as well. Fixing up three plates, I started putting them in the microwave. “How was Ava’s?”

That was all the prompting she needed to ramble on about her day, distracting her from asking about her mother, which I was grateful for. As I set down the plates for the two, I looked over at Charlotte.

“I know I’m asking a lot, but once I drop off this plate for aunt Raine, I have to go. Could you perhaps stay the night and make sure everything’s okay?”

“Of course. I wasn’t going to leave you with this anyways. A young kid like yourself surely has other things to be doing on a Saturday night.” I nodded my thanks, going upstairs with the third plate, knowing it probably won’t be eaten.

“Aunt Raine? Dinner’s here.” I peeked into the room, and it seemed I had woken her up.

“Oh.” She blinked, shifting Squall so that she had a better range of movement. “Of course.”

I came over and set down the plate on her nightstand. “I’m, uh. Headed out. I’ll be back in a few days.” Hesitating for a second, I leaned over and hugged her and her child lightly, mindful of the fragility of them both.  _ “I’m sorry, Squall.” _ I whisper, knowing that words would never be able to make up for what was going to happen.

“Goodbye.” And with that, I stepped into the hallway, and disappeared.

###################

It was a full week before I returned, Kinneas tired of me moping around the dorms, he shoved me out and told me not to come back until I had dealt with my issues.

The place was quiet, for the most part, only the sounds of a child playing quietly in the living room. I poked my head into the living room, seeing Ellone playing with a couple dolls unenthusiastically.

Knowing that I was just stalling for time, I forced myself up the stairs, knocking on Raine’s door, only to hear Charlotte’s voice call out. “Come in.”

The door creaked open ominously, and my heart dropped in my chest. Raine’s hair was plastered to her face with sweat, the dark circles under her eyes looked deathly. And the most telling piece of evidence was the weak hold she had on her son.

I wanted to cry, to scream at the unfairness of it all. She was too young to die like this, too good. Slowly, I made my way to her bed, sitting down beside her. The other woman excusing herself was white noise, my gaze locked on her. Aunt Raine.

“Loke?” She asked weakly, unfocused gaze settling on me. I placed my hand on her shoulder.

“Why didn’t you listen to me?” I asked brokenly, and she smiled.

“Don’t cry, please. And if I listened, I wouldn’t have seen Elle.” She sighed, and gestured for me to take Squall, and carefully I did so. “You’ve done so much for me already, and I hate to ask you more…”

Looking down at the infant in my arms, I took a deep breath. “Anything.” Anything, for the closest thing I had to a mother in years.

“With both me and Laguna no longer around, just, keep an eye on both my children, please?” I nodded, and she grabbed my free hand.

“Always.” Was my promise, and she smiled, large and happy, closing her eyes. Her heartbeat began to slow down, and my tears began in earnest, shaking me to the core. I could feel the life leaving her body, the last breath of air leaving her lungs.

She was gone.

Carefully, I placed her now cold hand on the bed, standing up. As I walked towards the door, Squall cried out for his mother, squirming as best he could.

In the living room, I could hear Charlotte talking to Elle in a low, soothing voice. Opening the door quietly, the young girl was the first to notice me.

“Aslan? Are you okay?” She asked innocently, and I had to hold back a new wave of tears. Ignoring the pitying eyes across the room, I knelt down to hold both Elle and Squall close to me.

“I’m so  _ sorry. _ ”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am growing increasingly attached to Loke, so, uh, this probably won't stop anytime soon. I hope you enjoyed, and have a wonderful day!


	6. At This Point, He Knew, He Fucked Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loke was so angry, it overrode all of his rational thought. This man was the reason Raine was dead, and he wanted to make him hurt.

**_“Laguna Loire.”_ ** My voice was basically a growl, deep and heavy with grief and anger. The man I had called for whirled around, a look of shock on his face. “Hello,  _ President.  _ Long time no see.”

“You’re that kid!” The worry in his voice was warranted, as I could feel the ugly snarl that my face had taken on, reminding me of the few times my father had been truly angry. When he tried to take a step backwards, I quickly flipped my spear, easily placing it against his throat. “How-why are you here?!” He stuttered out.

Stifling the almost insane laughter bubbling in my throat at his truly stupid question. “I don’t know how anyone could ever have found you worth loving. You had a _ family, _ one who loved you despite your many misgivings, and you left! There was ample opportunity to return, to help.” Tears stung in my eyes, but my voice was echoing around the room, Bahamut responding to my pain.

“What… what do you mean?” Seeing him shaking in terror, dawning realization in his eyes gave me no satisfaction.

“She’s  **dead!** Raine, the woman you claimed to love, is dead, while you were off in another land thousands of miles away. And not  _ once, _ did she ever stop believing that you’d return, until the very end.” The tears streaming down his face only made me want to break him, because he didn’t _ know _ pain, not yet.

“You’re lying…” He stopped when I pressed the blade harder against his skin.

I scoffed at the pathetic quivering pile of flesh who called himself a man. “You know nothing. I spent the last eight months of her life watching as she withered, waiting for your return.” I paused, blinking back tears. “Even the return of Ellone did not make her seek an actual doctor, because she wanted to be in Winhill when  _ you _ returned.”

“Ellone!” He exclaimed, and I raised an eyebrow at him. “Is she okay?!” The desperate look in his eyes made my rage abate, if only slightly.

“She is currently alright.” When he looked like he was going to demand answers, the spear pressed deeper. “You deserve much less than what I just told you. If you ever cared about her, you’d stay away. I cannot imagine you being able to care for a child on your own.”

Seeing something in his eyes crack, I took a step back, letting him slump to the floor. “May you relive these sins every day, every second, that Raine lives and you do not.”

And within one breath and the next, I disappeared.

But I felt no better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hold no real love for Laguna, and he deserves everything he got. Anyways, please review and kudos, and have a wonderful day.


	7. Don't you worry child (heaven's got a plan)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I used Don't you worry child by Swedish House Mafia because this is Loke in general, and fits this chapter best.

Nobody in town could take the two children in, and it hurt more and more with every shut door. Two days of pleading with everyone who was a suitable caretaker, I slumped down at the bar, while Charlotte patted my shoulder. She wanted to take them in, but with three of her own about middle school age, she simply didn’t have the finances.

There was a hesitant look on her face though, as she sat beside me. “Aslan… I’ve been meaning to ask you this for awhile now, but you aren’t really Raine’s nephew, are you?”

“...No. More like an orphan she took pity on.” I admitted, and a smile was visible on her face.

“Sounds like something she’d do. So they don’t have an aunt or uncle to go to?”

Shaking my head, I ran a hand through my hair. “Not anyone that I know of, I don’t think she mentioned anyone other than  _ Loire _ .” The name was spat like acid. “I mean, she talked about someone so close they were sisters, but there was no name, or anything helpful.”

Her face darkened. “Yes, well. I don’t think he would be someone to expose children to, the oaf.” She sighed. “But that leaves us with not a lot of choice. I mean, I think an… orphanage is perhaps our best bet.”

“I… know. I just really don’t want to. They don’t deserve that done to them.”

She nodded, and the hesitance was back. “Do you have anywhere to go after this place is closed? Maybe you should go with them.”

I thought of my aggravating roomate, who was a stickler for details, downside of living with a sniper. “I can’t go with them. I have responsibilities elsewhere. But I will look out for them, as much as I can manage.”

“Well.” She started, and I glanced at her. “I looked around for acceptable orphanages while you canvased town, and I came up with this.” A file was placed in front of me, and my heart clenched painfully reading the text.

“The Kramer Home for Children?” I asked, reading over information I had already memorized. “It’s… far.”

She snorted lightly. “Somehow, I don’t think that’ll be a problem for you. But seriously, any others I looked into were shady at best, and condemned at worst. This one has children around both of their ages, and the woman running it seems very kind.”

“What forms have to be filled out?” I asked, silently conceding to her plan, even if I wanted to take them both with me, to a different place, a different time. But that wasn’t feasible, I had tried bringing people places.

It didn’t work.

She glanced at me with concern, but slid me a piece of paper towards me. “Now since Raine left you as guardian, of them both,” My breath left me at that, but I didn’t stop her. “You have to fill these out. Thankfully you’ve grown in the past few months, so you look like you could be sixteen.” Yep, I was now just shy of six feet, growing a full six inches since first meeting Raine.

A shaky laugh left me as I started filling out the sheets. “Thank god for puberty.”

She didn’t respond to that, which I was thankful for. I don’t know that I would be able to hold myself together if she had tried to comfort me.

Once I signed at the bottom, it felt like I had just damned both Squall and Ellone, and I had to look away. “I’m-” I had to take a deep breath, gathering myself. “Going to go pack up their things.”

“What about Raine’s?”

“I-” He wanted Ellone to be able to have these memories intact, for Squall to be able to see a glimpse of who his mother was. “I’m going to leave them as they are. For when they’re older.”

She sighed. “I guess it makes sense that three months after you showed up she made you the sole benefactor in her will.”

“And you failed to mention this earlier because?” I asked, and she gestured around at everything.

“Aslan, I was told the day before you came back, and then she was _gone_.” Her voice calmed when I flinched slightly. “You were gone constantly, asking around town. You fell onto the nearest horizontal surface when you got in, so I couldn’t tell you then. This is the longest conversation we’ve had since the last time the bar was open.”

“Yeah, I guess that makes sense. But, I think anything I get from her, is going into keeping this place in order until either of them decide they want it.”

She smirked. “I don’t think you’ll need to fight anyone in town for that. Hell, some people might even pitch in if you asked.”

I shook my head at her. “I’ll manage. I’m going to pack their stuff.” Escaping as quickly as I could, I made my way up the stairs to Ellone’s room.

“Hi, Aslan. Do you want to play?” She asked, and I gave her a light smile at her cheer, happy to see her not in tears for once.

“Sure. I need to talk to you.” Sitting down across from her, I took the offered doll, following along with the young girls actions. “Elle, you’re a big girl now, right?”

She nodded enthusiastically. “Yep! I turned five a whole two months ago!”

I smiled at her. “You know what big girls get to do?” She shook her head. “They get to travel to new places, and see new people.” Her eyes widened.

“That’s so cool! Are we gonna _tra-vel?_ ” Her speech was hard not to find adorable, I found. “But,” She looked at the door, her excitedness falling away. “Does that mean mommy can’t come with?”

I was sure there had been enough tears in the past few days, but even so, I could feel their now familiar sting as I held them back. “No, we can’t, Elle. Remember what we told you? Mommy is up in heaven.”

“Then I don’t wanna go!” She shrieked suddenly, and I startled. “I want mommy! I want her! I want uncle Laguna, I want,” Tears streaming down her face, she ran over to me, pounding her tiny fists against my torso. “Give them _back_! You took away mommy! Give them back, I want them back!”

“Elle…” I could feel my body betray me, tears falling as I let her wear herself out.

Eventually, she began to calm down. “I want… mommy.” Each and every sob she let out broke my heart, especially when I knew it was my fault, not doing enough.

“I know, and I’m so sorry I can’t give her back to you.” I muttered, drawing her into a hug. She held on tightly, even though she still called out for Raine. _ “Hyne, I would do anything to bring her back to you.” _ I whispered quietly so she wouldn’t hear.

##########################

In the end, Charlotte was the one who managed to get Ellone into the car, even as she pointedly ignored me the entire ride to the ocean, and even as we piled onto the ship that I had paid to take us to the orphanage. As Charlotte turned back, having gone as far as she could, I turned and gave a nod, a silent thank you for all the help she had given both me and Raine.

As we got to the house, my heart fell to the pit of my stomach. I handed Squall over with the papers, and gave Ellone a large hug even as she frowned at me. "I hate you." She mumbled, and I forced myself to stand, and move away.

"Yeah, me too."

Even knowing that I’d be back, this felt like the end of something. Their second chance, maybe. But I still left at the end of the day, ignoring the pity on Edea’s face as she ushered the five year old inside.

Looking at the horizon as the boat made it back across the water, I let my tears fall. (The final time, I swore.)

And disappeared.

###################

Once a year, in a small town in the vast countryside, a young boy would show up in the month of August, wandering the town like a ghost. He disappeared into the closed tavern at night, like a ghost.

For the entire month he walked the town all day, only resting at the grave of a young woman for a few hours.

Except for the 22nd.

For he went to an orphanage by the sea, two small packages tucked under his arms. When he arrived, Edea would always be waiting for him, a sad smile on her face.

“Would you like to come see Squall and Ellone?” She would ask each time, and her expression would always fall when he declined. “I see. What brings you here?”  Even if the answer was always the same.

“Just some gifts for the two of them.” He would say, and dropped both brightly wrapped packages into her arms. “Tell them I said hi.”

Under her breath, she’d mutter, “You could tell them yourself.” But was ignored as he walked away, hands in his pockets. Sighing, the woman would go inside, the dawn not yet breaking. The red package left beside an infant's crib, and later his small bed.

The blue one was put away for safekeeping until Ellone’s birthday.

When they woke, the little boy would rejoice at the package, even if it was always a small lion plush, because it meant that there was someone outside the orphanage that cared. The young girl would smile softly at the hand sewn dolls, wishing she could apologize to the boy who had left her the gift.


	8. We are Strangers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I don’t know why you’re giving him those memories.”

“Ellone.”

I whirled around to see Aslan standing in the middle of the small room I had rented. “Don’t do that Aslan, you scared me!”

He shrugged. “My apologies. I don’t know why you’re giving them those memories.”

“He has a right to know about uncle Laguna!” I defended, and his eyes narrowed, chilling me. 

“And how will Leonhart know that is his father, or that these hold any importance beyond an odd dream? And even if he did, why would he care? He is a seventeen year old who hasn’t had parental supervision since he was what, six? Seven?”

I frowned at him. “You know, you’re being mean. How can you be so cold to him? You’re basically his cousin.”

“And you’re being naive if you think that you’ll be a big happy family once this is all over. I’m basically a stranger, which is a good thing. He is a soldier now, for better or for worse, and his family is his friends. Even if he doesn’t yet know it.”

“And how is what you’re doing any different from myself?” I asked, a hand on my hip. “You know, if there was any chance to bring mo-” My voice trailed off as he turned around.

He looked haggard, and I realized that at this point, he was years younger than I was. “Ellone, don’t talk about bringing her back. I tried.” Pinching his nose, he closed his eyes. “Hyne, I tried.”

“I know, but if I can just get Squall to do, something, anything, it could change all of it!” 

When he looked at me, I was pinned in place by a glare that turned my blood to ice. “This is no game, Ellone. The only reason I allow you to act this way is because it will not interfere. Laguna is not prepared for a child like Squall, and he will find it difficult to connect. His friends however, have known him since childhood, and are much better companions.” 

His eyes glowed golden for a moment. “Why can’t he have both?”

“If only it was that simple. In the end, that will be his decision. But if you push him into the role of perfect son and brother, he will leave.” 

And as I opened my mouth to protest, he disappeared.

“I swear to Hyne that little-”


	9. Forever Indifferent

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Breaking up with Seifer had been... difficult.

Breaking up with Seifer had been… difficult. But it was over, and Cid could no longer use it against him. Nobody could. 

All he wanted to do was sleep, and pretend nothing happened.

Squall was stopped, however, by a young teen leaning beside the door to his room. A bright blonde head of hair looked at the ground, and the brunette had to look away for a moment. 

“Leonhart.” Looking up when he was addressed, he scowled at the teen. Steel gray eyes gazed back, an identical frown on his face. “You screwed up. And you can’t even know how badly you’ve fucked up, because I’m not allowed to tell you.”

“Whatever.” The elder shrugged off the warning, and the blonde bristled.

“One day you’re going to regret those whatever’s. Look around you asshole, there are tons of people who would do anything for you, and all you can do is to brush them off.” He sighed then, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“You don’t like people seeing you weak. Personally, I can relate, but that isn’t an excuse to shut everyone away. The fact that you’re placing your career over-okay, I’m going to stop that right there.” He looked down at his wrist that had a blocky watch and swore. “Alright, I don’t have the time to finish this. Just-be more aware of those around you, and think before you say something unfeeling.”

Rolling his eyes, Squall scoffed. “And you know this how? And who even are you?”

“You can call me Solas. And let’s just say I have an invested interest in the future.”

The brunette went to open up his dorm room. “Solas, whatever.” As he stepped inside, he could hear the teen sighing, and smirked lightly.

He didn’t even wait around to see the blonde disappear into thin air, a small smile on his face.

“He could hear my name!”

**Author's Note:**

> Most of these are fairly short, but I'm thinking of posting one daily until I run out of ideas. I'd like to thank my girlfriend for strong-arming me into this fandom. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed, and have a wonderful day!


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